Last day of the challenge and I am again late… typical right? Anyway, today I’m going to tell you a story. So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh. I give to you:
THE DOG, THE CAT, AND… THE SQUIRREL
This is a true story, it happened a couple of weeks ago and it was funny as hell. So funny that as I told Kendra this story she laughed so hard she practically lost her voice. We live in a townhouse and we have a little fenced in area in the back, and we have various birds and critters that run around here and usually my dog Sky pays no attention to them. On this particular day, as I was walking into my kitchen I noticed this squirrel sitting on our fence minding his own business, munching on his snack. Upon seeing me he stops what he is doing and starts to scold me.
“Really dude? You are on my fence!”
I watch him chattering at me and then he takes off, across the top of the fence, down to the ground, across the lawn, up to the patio of our neighbor, and to the bird food. He gathers up a few seeds and things and runs back to his perch on my fence. He has Sky’s attention now. He finishes his snack and takes off like a bolt to my next door neighbors patio, thinking he is gone I go upstairs and switch the laundry from the washer to the drier. Sky is sitting at the back door, staring very intently and I know that he’s back out there. I can hear him chirping at the dog, scolding him for whatever reason. Mr. Squirrel decides to be brave and he comes down off his perch and comes closer. The dog barks, he flinched a little and then climbs up onto the seat of my sons bike. He is like two feet from the door. Not thinking fully I cracked the door to scare him away, that’s not his bike, he needs to get off. Sky takes the door opening as a que to… chase the squirrel. *FacePalm* In his effort to shove his 10 inch wide body through the half in wide crack in the door he jarred the door so much that the top sliding glass falls out into my hands.
“Are you f-ing kidding me?”
Here I am, holding this not so light glass from the door as my dog is now barking and trying to get the stupid squirrel from the top of the fence. The dog jumps and barks, the squirrel chatters and points, I get the glass back in the door. at this point I’m annoyed and amused all at the same time. I can just imagine the conversation going on between these two animals.
Dog: “Come here! I wanna play with you!”
Squirrel: “Do you think I’m stupid?”
Dog: “I don’t know… are you?”
Dog: “Want to play chase?”Squirrel: “You are a moron!”
Glass safely back in the door I call Sky to come in. He does not want to. I’ve got the door open and I’m trying to drag the dog in by his scruff as he is barking and jumping and trying really hard to find out what squirrel tastes like. I drag him in and tell him to go to his bed and take a time out. I go back to the door in time to realize that Kali, the cat, has gotten outside. During one of the times the door was open she has taken the opportunity to sneak outside. She has not been an outdoor cat in many many years, she has her moments of “I want to be outside” but it’s not very often. She’s not a big cat, but she’s bigger than the squirrel, and she is slinking towards him on the top of the fence. He is chattering furiously at her and then in a strange sudden burst of fur and furry the squirrel takes off… after my cat. The SQUIRREL is chasing my CAT! Isn’t this suppose to be the other way around? I open the gate just in time to see them taking off towards the parking lot. I grab a handful of cat food and head out the front door to retrieve my big bad cat out from under the neighbors car.
I really wish that I had gotten this on video. It was an amazing afternoon of delightfully unfortunate events that made me laugh till I cried and made Kendra’s voice take a small vacation.